I’ve had quite a few months of changes and challenges, adventures and exploration, letting go and stepping forward. Sosmetimes it seems that much of what is familiar to me is being stripped away piece by piece. Yet since nature abhors a vacuum, there always arrives in its place a new situation to be explored, embraced, adapted to. Whether I experience that as for better or for worse is, of course, a choice left entirely to me.

This has led me to a lot of thinking about doors - doors that close unbidden, and doors that open without my even knowing they were there. I'm often reminded of the saying that goes something like “when one door closes, another one opens.” There are many variations on that, and many attributions and misattributions; but regardless of who said it in what words, it's a reassuring and - to me - accurate thought. Now I'm not sure the idea of a magical synchronicity between the two doors is necessarily what's going on. Maybe it's that turning to look in another direction is really just a natural and healthy response to “ohmygosh, where do I go now?” But either way, it does at least SEEM magical, that moment when we finally turn our gaze away from what was and suddenly recognize the new opening.

Sometimes, of course, we're really grateful that a door has closed. But often a closing door is the ending of something familiar and dear, or at least something longed for; so sometimes we go into denial about it, or refuse to accept the closing. We keep pushing on the door to see if it's really finally closed once and for all. Or we knock again and again, or cry and complain about the unfairness, the wrongness of its closing.

Before you read any further, I invite you to pause for just a moment to reflect on the closing doors you've experienced - some that gradually closed, some that slammed closed in your face, some that you intentionally closed and locked yourself. You might be considering the loss of a friendship or your job or professional standing, or the rain on your holiday plans, or the aging of your physical body or mind, or the effects of climate change and political change, or anything you held dear or hoped-for which is no longer available to you. As you reflect, notice how you reacted to that door's closing, what you told yourself about the loss at the time. Recall what you felt in that experience, and what you did in response. Take your time with this pause.

Helen Keller, despite (or perhaps because of) her sensory challenges, was a keen observer of human nature. She said:

When one door of happiness closes, another opens;

but often we look so long at the closed door

that we do not see the one which has been opened for us.

While we are busy knocking and banging and pushing at the closed door, railing or bemoaning its closing, we may miss altogther that new possibility which is just now coming into view - now, as the first door has closed. Perhaps the new door could NOT open until the first door closed.  Or perhaps we just can't see it because we're so attached to what WAS. But when we take a step back and perhaps say “I don't know.” or “What now?” or even “Help!”, we open to and allow that which was not visible or available to us until we turn to it in our emptiness (which is really to say our non-attachment). 

Letting go of urgency, pushing, demanding, clinging … perhaps THAT's what brings forward the magic, those mysterious and wonderful happenstances. Perhaps that's what allows the opening door to appear. 

Oh what we find, when we stop searching.

Oh what we feel, when we stop forcing.

Oh what we receive, when we stop fearing.

Oh what we become, when we just love.

~ Creig Crippen

So if you're ready, let's do it now: Start by inviting your heart to lead you. Now just take a deep breath, and take a step back from that door that has closed to you. Let go of the handle, and turn to look around you. Gently soften your vision, soften your longing, and let go of any attachment, any expectation. Relax into your emptiness. Patiently and lovingly allow the emptiness to linger until your heart nudges you to walk through that new door you're just now beginning to see. Leaving behind your searching, forcing, and fear, there's only love walking with you. Allow love lead you and transform you as you walk gently yet boldly into the unknown. Be aware of your transformation as you remind yourself:  "Oh what we become, when we just love."

May your opening doors be many. And please let me know what you're becoming!